Susee Mable: May 20, 1941 - April 13, 2015
Anil, Susee and Suha, Niagara Falls 1977 Photo by: Raju |
Every day we live our lives on one
side of an equation. The variable on the other side is still unknown or at the
least, unclear. We have an idea, but that too is shaped by probabilities and it
is this uncertainty that derives value in what we do know for certain and what we
hope for at best.
When my mother passed away five
years ago, it hit my family very hard. We were as prepared for it as we ever
would be and did our best to honor mom. Each one of us is now treading a path
through grief collectively and singularly as best we can. The heartache is ever
present, and so too is the courage and strength which mom gifted to us.
Photo by: Suha |
The balance of the equation is in
understanding the nature of a unique and irreplaceable relationship, its loss,
its value and its effect on the self. The balance of the equation is the self—it’s all of us who remain. All of the love that was shared
ends up at our door, like a gift. It’s difficult to accept at first, because
it’s easily misunderstood. Time is what you’re left with, to take stock of a shared
history, to appreciate and celebrate it. In those first moments of awareness of
all that remains, a treasure trove of history is rediscovered; it comes in
waves, sometimes we cry, sometimes we laugh, but mostly we smile at some long
forgotten memory or series of memories, dawning a sliver of clarity and the
realization that it was real—and it was beautiful.
In death, we celebrate her life and
the value she brought to ours, we rediscover on a daily basis a profound gift
of unconditional love, like sunlight breaking into morning, emanating from down
the hall, the voices of loved ones sipping tea and laughing, a summer yet to be
known.
Posted by: Anil